Daydream Believer

Bert and I were driving down a street in my hometown that I'd driven down thousands of times before. I went to elementary school on that street, one of my best friends lived on that street, I'd been to high school senior parties on that street. I'd spent hours upon hours on Jackson Street in my lifetime. I looked out the window and saw some place that looked vaguely familiar, and I was lost for thought for a moment. When had I been there before?

Then it hit me. I used to date someone that lived there. Being as emotional as I am, of course I thought I'd never get over any failed relationship, but here I was...married and I couldn't even remember at first that I once knew a person that lived there.

Similar occurrences happened throughout my long weekend at home. I couldn't remember at first what used to be my main memories. Driving down Main Street, my thoughts used to flash back to nights out with my giant group of college girlfriends. Now my initial thoughts were shopping with Bert last time we were there and that I wanted to try this new restaurant my parents recommended. After that, I thought back to my friends and the nights we'd spent on that street after spending hours picking out "the perfect outfit." Instead of seeming like it was 5 years ago, it seemed like another lifetime.

We watched a beautiful display of fireworks from a parking lot at my old high school. Instead of thinking about life on a bell schedule, I thought about the playground out back and how I wanted to bring Ariana to the park close to our house in Georgia. Then, I remembered long ago when my friends and I liked to skip school during break so we could get better food somewhere else!

Storefronts, restaurants, bars and parking lots throughout anyone's hometown hold many memories. I was taken aback at how much my memories seemed to be changing. It makes sense that the most recent events are fresher in our minds than older ones, but I was amazed at how it took me time to remember old things. I smiled when thinking back to elementary school, high school and college. There were many, many good times there, but my vibrant memories are of "this lifetime"...being married, getting along with my parents and knowing and treasuring my dear friends.

Could I, the Queen of Holding Onto the Past, finally be living in the present and looking toward the future? While I remembered things from long ago, for the first time I could only remember happy times. If I even began to remember something that brought me pain, it was only fleeting. I wasn't lost in my world of daydreams anymore. As a child, I stayed lost in daydreams...thinking of being interviewed by Barbara Walters as a famous actress or having a lavish royal wedding. I've always loved to daydream, but on this trip, I found myself more aware of my surroundings. My eyes weren't glazed over while my mind was in some farwaway place.

I think it's because I'm finally living my daydreams in the present.

Note on comments: I deleted my note on an earlier post about leaving comments without a Blogger.com ID. I finally figured out what was wrong with my comments and I changed the settings so anyone can leave their thoughts! Post away...