Tom, Snopes and Crystal Meth Pizza

THANK.GOD.IT'S.FRIDAY!! This week I have torn two dresses and broken a bracelet. I have been harassed on the Internet and harassed in person. A woman threw herself at my husband at the gym and then did the same thing to my friend's boyfriend. The fact I haven't thrown a fit is a miracle. The fact I didn't fall flat on my face while trying to kiss my husband and mark my territory while on the Elliptical is a miracle. The fact I have channeled my anger into working out is a miracle.

What a week!

Anyway, I have two topics to address that are requests from friends, and then I'm on to discuss the most delicious crystal meth pizza ever that I had last night.

First, my friend Emily wants to know why Tom Cruise was crying on the cover of "Life & Style" magazine recently. Although I am obsessed with celebrity gossip, I really haven't heard anything about this, so there must not be much to it. My best guess? Tom was probably crying because Katie (excuse me, Kate) said something he didn't agree with. As in, "Oh, Tom, I absolutely hate artichokes!" "WHAT? YOU MUST AGREE WITH EVERYTHING I SAY, FEEL, THINK AND DO!!!" Yeah, that's my best guess...you never know with that crazy man. I think he's trying to mold Kate into the perfect Stepford Wife. Hope you fall flat on your face, Tommy Boy.

And my friend Amber and I share a similar pet peeve: stupid email forwards that just simply aren't true. People, please, please, please visit Snopes before sending out forwards! No, sending out forwards to 489047 people isn't going to put Rachel any closer to getting an operation. No, if you microwave something in plastic it's not going to kill you. No, diet drinks are not of the devil and don't cause Multiple Sclerosis. And yes, Coca-Cola did in fact once contain cocaine. This web site quickly dispels rumor and separates fact from fiction.

Now, on to crystal meth pizza. We went out last night with our friends Mary Ellen and Dave who are moving soon. We are not too happy about that and plan on hiding in the back of their U-Haul. Anyway, last night we went to this grungy pizza place that we found out was very likely the site of one of the biggest crystal meth labs in Georgia! The owner has been arrested, but they police aren't commenting if the restaurant was the site of any illegal activity. We had a great time with them...who else can you bicker with your spouse in front of and kick your shoes off with? Who else can you eat the best pizza in town with and not care that it could be the front for illegal activity? Friends like them are hard to come by...

So to Tom, please volunteer yourself for some mission on behalf of Scientology that requires you to go find the aliens your religion speaks of. Disappear. And Snopes, thank you for providing such a great service. Please note you will be lost for days once you visit Snopes for the first time...it's addictive. And to friends you can just be yourself with...well, that's just been the best part of the whole damn week.